The Obsession with Me, Myself and I

For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.”

Romans 8:6

When a person lacks relationships with other people, they tend to rely on their inner thoughts for assurance, affirmation and guidance. While this inner voice, which is also known as our conscience, can serve as a helpful tool to convict us when we do wrong, when we have no other voices of reason to rely on, it can also drive us to make impulsive decisions.

Human beings were built for relationships. In fact, after God created Adam he stated that it was not good for man to be alone and made him a suitable partner to share his duties with.  (Genesis 2:18). Evidently, when a person struggles to relate to others, they stop reaching out to other people, and instead withdraw within themselves. This is how the obsession with ‘me, myself, and I’ is born.

Now some people may argue that they cannot be obsessed with themselves since they do not conflate their self-worth or tend to walk around with a big head so to speak. But that’s just it; the fixation of self does not necessarily have to take on the form of arrogance or pride. On the contrary, a person can become obsessed with themselves by harboring self-deprecating thoughts that highlight their weaknesses.

And just like an individual who is obnoxiously full of themselves can construct a world that revolves around how “amazing” they are, someone with low self-esteem can create a reality where they are the worst person to have ever walked the earth.  Both ends of the spectrum are equally as dangerous since preoccupation with self leads to selfishness, self-pity and self-hate. It is important to note that all of the aforementioned clauses begin with the same four letters.

What does God say about Self-Centeredness?

 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. ‭‭

Philippians‬ ‭2‬:‭3‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Making everything about what you think and how you feel is the quickest way to sabotage relationships. This is because selfishness and self-centered thinking is the primary cause of conflicts, disagreements and dissension.

James 4:1 says, “What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?” (NIV). Every trouble starts because of our self-centeredness.”

If you haven’t figured it out by now, the world does not revolve around you. But you shouldn’t feel too bad because the universe does not revolve around me either.

Scripture is very explicit about emphasizing the importance of selflessness and the greatest example it gives us revolves around Christ Himself. In truth, Jesus loved us so much that He laid down his life for each and every one of us (1 John 3:16).

But there’s more to the verse, because the man of God said because Christ loved us so much to sacrifice His own life so that we could be saved, we should also be willing to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters. Obviously, a person cannot if they are only thinking about themselves.

My friends, there is nothing wrong about having a desire to work on our weak spots. But as we try to improve these areas, it is important to keep in mind that the answer to our insecurities cannot be found in our physical appearance, job title or bank account.

In fact, the solution to our self-image problems –that are virtually triggered by our desire to be approved and accepted by others– cannot only be found through selflessness. Truly, when we think about ourselves less and make an effort to focus on God’s word more, He will give us the drive, wisdom and self-discipline we need to bring about lasting change in our lives.